Quantum effects observed in classical objects in my backpack
I’ve had the same backpack for ten years. It’s a three-compartment laptop bag in basic black rip-stop nylon. I bought it at one of the outlet malls in Las Vegas back when I vacationed there three or four times a year. I use it every day carrying it everywhere I go. It’s become a part of my identity to the point where people ask where it is if I appear in public without it.
The small, front compartment I use in more or less the same way as a ladies’ handbag and it includes a similar collection of stuff—stuff which occasionally disappears, and has now started reappearing. This IM conversation from last week Friday morning tells the story:
CBC: Good Morning.brucew: Hi!
brucew: I’m a bit boggled this morning. How about you?
brucew: I observed quantum effects in classical objects in my backpack last night.
brucew: Should I alert George Noory?
CBC: What the hell are you talking about?
brucew:
brucew: You know, quantum teleportation or particles popping into or out of existence randomly. Not sure which is responsible for the effect.
CBC: So, explain what happened last night.
CBC: Friday is open lines on C2C. If the story is good, call in.
brucew: Things that had verifiably disappeared from my life have started reappearing in my backpack.
CBC: How long ago did these things disappear?
brucew: My Cross pen has been missing for nearly a year. I reached in for my flashlight last night and pulled out the pen instead.
brucew: My emergency backup purple disposable lighter reappeared last night too.
brucew: I have thoroughly emptied and checked that bag more times than I care to count. Even run it through the washing machine.
brucew: And the pre-flight security scans when I visited you.
brucew: I’m eagerly awaiting the return of my missing 1GB flash drive and bus tokens. Four of them, that were on my spare keyring. Keyring’s always been there. Have no idea how the bus tokens got off it.
Curiously, it’s quantum effects appear to be expanding. It’s the only explanation for what happened yesterday at Presbytery. There’s a closet on the other side of the wall from my desk there. The quantum backpack was leaning against the wall when someone went inside the closet. She found, just on the other side of the wall from the backpack, a dust-covered antique condom box.
Genesco Naturals is the brand, made by the Schaeffer Products Company of Cleveland, Ohio. It contain(ed) “¼ Dozen for One Dollar”. The box is cardboard, similar in size, shape and construction to a matchbox. Sliding the thing open, we found one (presumably unused, given that it was still rolled-up) very dried and rotted-out condom inside.
People go into that closet daily. There’s no way it could have been there without having been noticed. Especially not long enough to become foxed with dust. Quantum teleportation is the only explanation. Or perhaps some sort of wormhole effect.
