Heat of the moment
It’s quite a bit cooler today than it’s been—only the mid-80s (not quite 30°C). It won’t be official until Saturday, of course, but this has been the hottest June in at least 32 years, possibly 50 years. RG&E set new, all-time records for electricity consumption in four of the past seven days.
I don’t necessarily mind the heat. We’ve had a couple of days where the humidity was low enough that I found the weather quite enjoyable. For the most part, however, it’s been damned humid. The stickiness bothers me just as much as it does most people.
I’ve been getting by with two or three showers a day, but that just makes the bathroom all the more humid. The shower stall hasn’t been dry in over a week, and it takes over 24 hours for towels to dry—and that’s when they’re hanging on a rack a foot away from the wall and in front of the window. I hope my laundry is dry before I leave tomorrow morning.
On the phone this afternoon, I quipped to CBC that I’m so tired of having hot, sweaty, itchy balls that I can begin to see some of the merit in her decision. After she recovered from both the shock and the laughter, she said it was one benefit she hadn’t thought of.
My body is revolting in other ways too. I’ve never been able to use antiperspirants because they make me break out in a nasty rash. Every so often, so do plain deodorants. This week for instance. While hydrocortisone cream does help with the itching, it doesn’t help with the stink. Even with two or three showers a day.
Even less pleasant, hemorrhoids have attacked. Do you know how difficult it is to handle and insert a suppository when it’s already nearly body temperature? Plus the ointment (which goes on much easier when it’s warm, BTW) leaves me feeling all lubed up with no prospects for sex. I mean, even if I could right now, who would want to?
So… hot, sticky, stinky, itchy, well lubed, and possibly with damp laundry, I’m off for Toronto tomorrow morning. Did I mention there’s going to be a ribbon-cutting ceremony for the ferry? I hope to dodge the press and dignitaries.
On the other hand, if I’m detained at Customs for a cavity search, I’ll already be lubed.
June 29th, 2005 at 11:29 pm EST
go to GNC and get a deodrant crystal. it has alum in it and it works.
try gold bond powder for your crotch.
i have no advice for the hemorrhoids. oh, wait, sitz bath! and keep the suppositories in the fridge.
you don’t have to post this comment, just some helpful hints from the northerner moved south Registered Sweaty Nurse.
call me if you need more hints and helpful tips.